The biggest problem with the pilot for Constantine is that the property isn’t particularly well-known.  Unless one was a reader of Hellblazer or well-versed in DC Comics lore, the only real point of reference is the Keanu Reeves film from a few years back.  And that wasn’t a terrible film on its own, but largely considered to be a poor representation of the character.  I don’t know that anyone would feel differently by the end of this premiere.

 

Despite being full of exposition and liberally drenched in scares and blood, I came out of the pilot wondering why I should care about John Constantine and his mission at all.  Sure, there are demons and dark magic aplenty throughout Atlanta, apparently, but what makes me want to watch Constantine fight them?  Constantine’s most recognizable character trait, right now, is his absurdly variable “British” accent.

 

The biggest problem is that there is already a well-beloved television riff on Constantine, and his name was Spike.  If Constantine managed to meet Spike even halfway in the demon-hunting, attitude-tossing Brit camp, maybe the series would be off to a better start.  Constantine, however, goes through so many different tonal shifts throughout the hour that I can’t even be sure if Constantine as a character is taking things too seriously or not at all.  From scene to scene, it’s a mystery.

 

Not to mention that I love Lucy Grittiths, between her turns on Robin Hood and True Blood, yet the character of Liv somehow managed to have even less personality than Constantine.  Her reactions and choices felt far more driven by plot needs than consistent character motivations, and if she is meant to be a viewpoint character for the audience, it doesn’t quite connect.  Of course, that doesn’t matter, because she apparently tested so poorly with audiences that she is going to be replaced post haste with a completely different character, thus making the time and energy spent on introducing her in the premiere a complete waste of time!

 

By the time that Constantine sets his hands on fire to face down his enemies in a dark alley at the end of the premiere, I was left wondering why I should care.  And that’s a big problem for a pilot trying to sell the audience into spending another hour’s worth of time (or DVR space) on a new show.  I have nothing holding my interest going into the second episode: no major plot hooks, no characters of interest, not even a world mythology to sink my teeth into.