For the Love of God... Batman is a Superhero!
Last week a coworker approached me and asked if I thought Batman was a superhero. I was flabbergasted. “Of course Batman is a superhero,” I said without hesitation. This person then went on to tell me how wrong I was, and proceeded to give me reasons why Batman wasn’t a superhero. He then called someone else over and posed the same question. That second person agreed with him and then they both proceeded to give me shit about it.
First let me say this, I never in my wildest dreams thought that I would ever have to write an article stating why Batman was a superhero. I didn’t even know that there was a segment of the population that felt that way. However, I guess I shouldn’t be too shocked; at one point a few misguided souls thought that the Earth was flat. I really just thought that Batman being a superhero was one of life’s constants.
The main argument I hear against Batman being a superhero is that he doesn’t have any powers. That, in my humble opinion, is a load of crap. Batman is a genius. His mind and deductive reasoning ARE his power. Get Stephen Hawking out of his wheelchair and have him fight crime, and he would be a superhero as well. Not only does Batman have his mind as a super power, he also has a secondary power: his ability to multitask. He can be up all night saving the city, and then continue with his philanthropy work during the day without skipping a beat. Oh yeah, he finds time to bang supermodels in between!
People also say that Batman is not a superhero because anyone can do what he does if they had the resources. Guess what? If you are a genius, are in prime physical condition, and fight crime: congratulations... you are a superhero.
Batman is also a superhero because he fights super villains in addition to petty thugs. The super villains have powers such as superhuman strength (Bane, Killer Croc), the ability to fly (Man-Bat, Killer Moth), the ability to control plant life (Poison Ivy), et cetera, et cetera. It takes a superhero to defeat a super villain or else the police would be able to take care of these guys and we wouldn’t need Batman. If Batman wasn’t a superhero, and just “an average guy” then why does the police call on him to help them out?
For those of you who are into mathematics, I have devised a formula to prove that he’s a superhero. Are you ready for this? SUPER+HERO=SUPERHERO. Super: Batman is super. He fights crime, has cool gadgets, and wears a neat costume. These items all make him super. Hero: Batman has saved Gotham City on several occasions. He has defused bombs, prevented the city from disasters, and has rescued kittens from trees. He is a hero.
Batman is super + Batman is a hero= Batman is a superhero.
As with a lot of debates, there are usually two sides to the dispute. The debate over whether or not Batman is indeed a superhero is one of them. Look, I get the argument against Batman not being a superhero. I see where you’re coming from and I get your point. But the simple fact of the matter is that you are wrong. Batman is, and will always be a superhero.
vandalous
7/4/2012 1:17 PM
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What about Punisher? Is he a superhero?